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Meet Dominatrix Ai from the San Francisco Bay Area. The intelligent, creative and beautiful Mistress shares how she found her calling as a Dominatrix, what the Femdom scene in California looks like, and why she redesigned her website to take control of her visitors’ experience. In this interview, Ai also explains the concept of Plant Play, the psychology behind humiliation, and what inspires her as a professional Dominatrix.
Lady Sas: Dear Ai, please describe to us how you became a Dominatrix.
Dominatrix Ai: I fell into being a Dominatrix pretty naturally, having been drawn to kink all my life. I had the opportunity to connect with and shadow a few different Dommes in the San Francisco Bay Area as I was developing my own individual style, and I attended as many kink-related classes and workshops as I could to jumpstart my newfound calling. It took time to build everything from the ground up, but it was, and still is, a labor of love.
Lady Sas: What can you tell us about the Femdom scene in California? How does society deal with this issue?
Dominatrix Ai: While we’re very fortunate to have a well-established, vibrant kink scene here in California, it’s not perfect. Pro Dommes are still vulnerable to having their services criminalized due to state solicitation laws aimed at criminalizing sex workers. Living under constant duress forces workers to rely on mutual aid resources and community harm-reduction methods to keep themselves safe, all while continuing to fight for decriminalization.
Interview with Dominatrix Ai, San Francisco Bay Area, California
Lady Sas: Your website has an unusual structure. Visitors cannot select individual sections from a menu, but are guided step by step through a kind of dialogue. Why did you design your website this way? Do you want to take control of your visitors’ experience already on your website?
Dominatrix Ai: Yes, exactly. I really enjoy designing and iterating on my website and am always thinking about how to optimize it to better meet my needs. I decided to redesign it after noticing a number of users were skipping over crucial information and going straight to the submission form. That led me to rethink the whole user experience and take control of the user flow, with the aim of deterring those who weren’t fully engaged and attracting users who were thoughtful and curious enough to navigate the site as intended.
Lady Sas: You offer “Plant Play”. What does that mean?
Dominatrix Ai: I occasionally like to incorporate elements from the natural world into my play, particularly during spring and summer when the resources are abundant. I might use plants for sensation play or chemical play, or create flower arrangements using a submissive’s body as the vase or canvas. It’s fun because people typically don’t expect it, or it’s not something they’ve considered playing with before.
Lady Sas: What are the psychological reasons why many subs enjoy humiliation?
Dominatrix Ai: I think the psychological reasons vary from person to person, but experiencing humiliation in a safe setting with someone trustworthy can be very liberating. People who strive for perfection or are perceived as strong figures in some capacity can sometimes feel trapped in those roles. Humiliation offers an outlet for them to be vulnerable, imperfect, and messy, with the knowledge that they’ll still be accepted by their play partner after all is said and done.
Practical tips for women getting started
Lady Sas: What tips do you have for women who are thinking about trying their way as a private Femdom?
Dominatrix Ai: I’d encourage them to find a trusted partner or partners to explore with and discuss common interests, limits, safety plans, and more before getting started with play. Clear communication and a strong foundation of mutual understanding can only benefit all parties as you build your dynamics and discover your own domination style.
Lady Sas: What inspires you? How do you come up with fresh ideas?
Dominatrix Ai: It’s tough to name specific sources of inspiration because I believe it can be derived from almost anything. That said, I’ve found that inspiration and ideas flow best when I’m in a calm, grounded headspace. For me, state of mind is key for being receptive to fresh ideas, so I try to approach my scene preparation slowly and intentionally. There’s nothing I dislike more than feeling rushed. If time allows for it, I’ll even meditate before a session to ground myself as much as I can.
Lady Sas: Please tell us how you spend your free time.
Dominatrix Ai: I’m really drawn to anything that gives me a means of expressing myself. Whether it’s through music, cooking, or writing, I enjoy most activities that allow me to channel my creative energy. I also love doing things that help me stay embodied. I find a lot of joy in dancing, hiking, and exercising in general, as ways of being more present and exploring my body’s capabilities and limits.
Lady Sas: What are your plans for the future?
Dominatrix Ai: As far as my domination work goes, I’m in the process of learning new skills to add to my repertoire. I’m a real glutton for knowledge and will be investing time in my studies in the near future. I also have plans to travel in the coming year, so keep an eye out – I might be coming to a city near you.
Lady Sas: Thank you very much.
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Other fascinating interviews:
→ Mistress Gemma Li, Denver, Colorado
→ Mistress Rozz – Dominatrix in Los Angeles & New York City
